


In Love With Bucky Barnes (and Other Things Steve Rogers is Definitely Not)

by rightings



Series: dumb boys [2]
Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Boys Kissing, Fluff, M/M, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Post-Serum Steve Rogers, That is It, sam wilson will confirm, the title is a lie, this is literally 2k words of fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2017-12-08
Packaged: 2018-09-20 16:34:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9500264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rightings/pseuds/rightings
Summary: And Steve didn't exactly plan for it to be this way, but it happens. He's not exactly sure what that means.





	

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know what this is..................gggrr i love bucky and so does steve so here you go  
> BYTHE WAY!!!  
> this is the second part of a series but u don't have to read the previous work to understand this!! part 1 was just pre-war bucky coming out to steve but they don't ever get together in that fic so this is where they actually do get together !!:D

* * *

 

Ever since Steve's gotten Bucky back, he's been careful to keep his distance. Not because Steve wants to or anything, but because Bucky seems uncomfortable with any type of human contact. Before the war, it would've been impossible for Bucky to watch 10 minutes of a movie without snuggling on Steve's bony shoulders. Even after the serum, those few months that he and Bucky got together, he still craved touch, the same way he did from Steve's asthmatic self. So the problem here, today, had nothing to do with with Steve's new body. At least Steve doesn't think so. And, sure, it's nearly killing him, staying away from Bucky for so long while he's _right there_ , but Steve's a grown ass man, thank you very much. He's mindful of people's comfort zones. Even if Bucky's seems to be any place far away from Steve. 

Even so, after being denied access for so long, Steve forces himself to not peer into Bucky's eyes and determine what the exact color is (marble gray, for anyone wondering) when Bucky sits on the stool, allowing Steve to shave his stubble and cut his hair. Steve's not so sure how to feel about it; Bucky cutting his hair. He thinks Bucky manages to look good in every single hairstyle, of course, but the only differences between old Bucky and the Bucky of now are the hair and beard. If Bucky removes them, he'll look exactly like old Bucky, save for the few aging spots on his face. If Steve sees Bucky, the way he did years ago, happy and care-free, and at the same time look at the Bucky that lives with him now, careful and measured, he thinks it might kill him. He nods with a grin when Bucky asks him to help him in the bathroom either way. He thinks he might do just about anything Bucky asks if he's allowed a nanosecond of being near him. 

He's not in love, shut up Sam, it's his childhood best friend. How rude would he have to be to decline Bucky something when he's already been declined so much? 

"You're going to cut off my left ear with that razor," Bucky points out, pulling Steve out from his thoughts.

Steve glares at him, "I know how to operate a razor, Buck. I'm Captain America."

"The fuck you do," Bucky shakes his head. Or at least, tries to. Any major move would result in said ear coming off. "There's not an inch of facial hair on you. Or body hair."

"You haven't seen every inch of me," Steve supplies. 

"Are you suggesting that you take your pants off, now? Jesus, Rogers, if you wanted to get in my pants, you could'a just asked." Bucky does this, joking back and forth with Steve, it's familiar and warms Steve's heart. It's just like old Bucky. The only part lacking is him taking comfort in contact. The friendly shove that Bucky would've reached out to push on Steve never happens anymore. The arm around Steve's neck had turned into a laugh and a shake of the head, muttering, "you fuckin' punk." The random scares Bucky gives Steve by jumping on his back (never actually putting all of his weight on Steve) are done now by Bucky throwing random objects to Steve and yelling "think fast!" It bothers Steve more than he lets on. And he wears his heart out on his sleeve. 

"By all means, Bucky, keep on stroking your ego," he realizes the fault in his words the second they leave his mouth. Bucky's eyes glint; Steve feels his own eyes twitch. It's only fair.

"Would you rather me stroke somethin' else?"

 _No_ , Steve thinks, the big ol' softy, _please keep stroking your ego to no end. Please feel good about yourself. God knows you deserve to._ Steve doesn't say any of that. He instead says an insult or something rude to shut him up. He grabs the razor and shaves off that one last spot, standing up wordlessly and leaving Bucky to wash his own face. Steve's been deliberately ignoring Bucky's hair, so he excuses himself. He doesn't want to see Bucky's face all freshly shaved without at least giving himself some time to prepare. It's bound to happen, Steve's not an idiot. 

As he leaves, he hears the water running. It's exactly 2 minutes and 32 seconds when every air passageway in Steve's body is blocked, the water of the sink stopping short. Bucky's footsteps. Maybe Bucky's not coming to Steve's room. Maybe Steve doesn't have to meet it head first for a couple of more hours. If he fakes falling asleep, maybe he can ignore it for up until tomorrow morning. He's considering all possibilities when Bucky's footsteps sound louder, then: "Hey, Steve, what's for lunch? I was thinkin', like take out or somethin'? There's this new Indian place a coupl'a blocks down. I never saw Indian restaurants that deliver, have you?"

"Huh," Steve says, intelligently. It's worse than he imagined. By that, he means Bucky looks so...Bucky. It's not like he hates the long hair, he loves it. It frames Bucky's face nicely and the stubble accents his jawline, cut evenly. But this is something else. His short hair and his soft face makes him look so young. And Steve's so gone. He's so gone and he's been staring at Bucky's face. For how long? Steve's not sure, time is not really a concept his mind is able to grasp. 

"Steve," Bucky's tone is amused, but Steve thinks he hears a hint of worry. 

"Huh?" Steve says again, then, "I'm sorry. You look..." Handsome. Amazing. Drop-dead gorgeous. Ethereal. Attractive. Beautiful. Heart-stopping. Lovely. Angelic. Hot. Pretty. Stunning. Killer. Cute. Appealing. 

"Yeah?" A smile, maybe on the edge of a smirk. 40's Bucky is smirking at him. Steve is going to cry. Or puke. He's not sure which option is less humiliating. 

"You look...good. Really. Good." Sure, that's one way to put it.

"Yeah?" He says, again. Steve's going to kill Bucky. Or kiss him. Kiss him and then kill him afterwards? "Dang, I thought you'd like the whole hobo thing I had going on earlier,"

"I do!" Steve is exclaiming, way too fast. Shit, fucking shit Steve, shut your mouth. "I mean, I do. I did. But you look younger. Innocent. Like, you know, you've got the whole boyish smirk thing going o- yeah, kind of like the way you're smiling right now. I take back what I said earlier; not so innocent. But. Um... Jesus,  Buck, put your eyebrows down, they're judging me," and yeah, okay, Steve totally just rambled. 

Bucky's eyebrows don't come down completely but he does lower them down a little, so Steve appreciates the effort. Bucky's laughing though, saying in a mock serious voice, "that's nice, Steve, thanks for your studies on my younger, good, not-so-innocent, boyish face. I am pleased. You, too, have a very nice face." 

Steve's not blushing, Steve's not blushing, Bucky's not staring at Steve because Steve is _not_ blushing.

"You're blushing," Bucky points out, unnecessarily, Steve blushes even more. 

"Am not," Steve pouts, honest to God pouts. And he swears he's imagining the way Bucky is staring at his lips. Speaking of lips, Bucky's look even softer without the stubble surrounding them, and fuck, now he's staring at Bucky's lips. Shit. "Um, so... right. Indian sounds nice," he says, just to distract himself, and get Bucky out of his room before Steve does something stupid, like kiss him. 

Bucky's eyes flick upward again, "what? Oh. Yeah, sure. I'll just get whatever looks good." And he walks out. And Steve is going to fucking pull his own vocal chords out of his throat and make a noose out of them. 

 

\---

 

Steve jolts out of his nap when a knock on his door sounds. Shit. When did he fall asleep? He idly scratches at his chest and yawns. How long has he been out for? It couldn't be long, not really, the sun hasn't set yet, according to the light shining from his window. He loses track of time again, as he sits there on his bed, just barely awake. The knock comes once more, this time paired with a small, "Steve?"

Oh. Yeah, the door. "Yeah, Buck-" Yawn. "Come in."

Bucky does, holding two plastic bags of what is presumably food, judging by the smell of spices, in both his hands. He's sort of smiling but it immediately drops the second he sees Steve, "shit. I'm sorry. Did I wake you up?" 

Steve shakes his head, even though it was very obvious that, yes, Bucky just woke Steve up. "'T'was jus' a nap," he mumbles a little, sending a grin in Bucky's direction. One that Bucky returns, albeit a little hesitantly. And they're both looking at each other, smiling and 

But then Bucky just shakes his head, and says, "c'mon. Go wash up and I'll get the table set up," and then wiggles the bags in his hands for emphasis. Steve thinks he sees a little bit of the butter chicken spill out. He only nods his head in response. Bucky nods back and leaves. 

Steve is stretching his legs as he stands up and is making his way to the bathroom. When he leaves his room, 5 minutes later, he finds Bucky lying on the couch, watching The Office. The coffee table in front of him has 2 plates, one for him and one for Steve, presumably, and then 3 aluminum containers of Indian food, side by a handful of utensils. "Hey," Steve greets. Bucky looks up.

"Jesus, took you look 20 minutes in the bathroom, what'd you do in there?" Bucky teases, already leaning over the table to start putting food on his plate. 

Steve quickly follows, "wouldn't you like to know?" Then shoves a bite of Tandoori chicken in his mouth so that he can blame the blush on his cheeks on the spiciness of the chicken. I mean, he is white. 

Bucky laughs, "you can't blame me for wanting to," and Steve panics, but then Bucky is continuing, "I am the one who you woke up looking at, so you know, I'm probably the reason you got keyed up, anyway." 

"Shut up,"

"Ooooh, I totally got you there, didn't I?"

Steve can't help it; he gets defensive, and moves a little further away from Bucky, "I didn't jerk off, Bucky. I was in there for like, all of 5 minutes,"

Bucky senses it, of course, he fucking does. And moves closer, putting a hand on Steve's shoulder. Shit. Bucky actually touches Steve, and then says, eyes reaching out to Steve and all, "come on, pal, you know I'm jus' messin' with you..."

And fuck, Bucky's looking at him like that. And he's so gone. Not in love. Not in love. Not in love. (Okay, maybe he's a little in love, he's come to terms with it by himself. He's not quite ready to admit it to Sam just yet. Surprisingly, the admission doesn't cause a significant change in him like he expected. Maybe every little fiber of him knew it all along, but shook in denial. He loves Bucky either way. And Steve didn't exactly plan for it to be this way, but it happens. He's not exactly sure what that means.)

Bucky grins, and leans in to cover those last 2 inches between them. Bucky is kissing him. Actually kissing him, on the lips. And Jesus, Bucky definitely tastes like butter chicken and Steve is in love with Bucky and Bucky is kissing him. So, Steve does what seems reasonable: kiss back. And they're kissing. Not just on the lips anymore, but with tongue and teeth and Steve is done for. He hears a whine, and was it him letting out the desperate sound? Yes, probably. Bucky pulls back, and there's that pathetic sound again, oh, yes, that's definitely Steve whining. Bucky grins- no, not a grin. A grin doesn't not describe the smile on Bucky's face right now. There is no word in the English language that would do Bucky any justice. 

But then Bucky looks up and his eyes look a lot more blue than gray. Steve is certain his eyes have morphed into hearts when Bucky says, "I love you,"

Bucky loves him. Like actually loves him. Like does-not-hate-Steve-and-actually-tolerates-him-but-in-a-caring-way-but-also-not-platonic loves him. Steve takes Bucky's face in his hands and kisses him. 

(Steve is in love with Bucky and he's still not sure what that means, but Bucky loves him back and he's positive that whatever it means could never be bad.)

 


End file.
